Doin What I Have To
People always say they’re proud of me. That’s nice, but I don’t really think there is anything to be proud of. My dad died suddendly less than two weeks after my graduation and I was forced to take care of myself. Since then, I’ve been doing what I have to do. Nothing spectacular, just making it.
It’s weird though because I don’t know an alternative to what I’m doing now. I didn’t have the option of moving to Atlanta with my mom. As executor of my dad’s estate, I have to stay in Ohio. I have to live and I have to work. So, again, I’m just doing what I have to.
It’s nice being on my own in certain ways, but it also sucks. I hate paying bills. That’s the worst. And it is weird looking at my life and eliminating unnecessary expenses like cable and an unlimited talk plan on my cell phone. I still get my hair, nails and eyebrows done….and spend an ungodly amount of money on clothes, but I think part of being “Miss Independent” is looking pretty. Or maybe that’s just what I tell myself to make myself feel slightly better about being a shopaholic. I dunno.
But yeah, I think it’s nice when people say they’re proud of me, but there are so many things I want to do that I haven’t done yet. Therefore, I’m not proud of me yet.
Hold your applause.
I’m just getting started.