Month: June 2010

Lessons in Love

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I’ve learned a lot in the past year. Besides the obvious lessons that come along with living on your own for the first time and the when-will-I-ever-need-this-again lessons that come along with being executor of an estate, I’ve learned a lot about relationships with men. A LOT.

It sucks though because every time something ends, people always say “you learned a lesson”.

That would be great if a relationship with a guy were like Philosophy 101 - I go into it knowing that I am learning a lesson to use later down the road. Relationships (hopefully) are not like that at all. And if the consolation of getting my heart broken is a “lesson” well, I want my money back.

Besides, when does the learning stop?

When is class dismissed? When do I actually get to put my lessons into practice? And how many lessons will I learn before I actually get it right?

The problem with living and learning in relationships is that while you can learn what you did wrong with Boy A that doesn’t necessarily apply to Boy B because people are different and I must make allowances for that.

Is it possible to do different things yet get a variation of the exact same result?

Are there universal truths when it comes to men?

Lessons Learned in Vegas: Love is a Gamble

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I’m not a gambler and I don’t get the “tables” anyway. So, on weeks like this week that I’m in Las Vegas, I just try my luck on a few slot machines and spend the rest of my money eating and shopping.

Last night, I played the Wheel of Fortune slot machine. It’s my favorite because you win money plus, if you land on “Spin”, you get to spin the wheel and win whatever number of quarters that the wheel lands on (from 25 to 2000!).

It only costs $1.25 to play, so I put up $20 and decided to play a few times. Two tries later, I had doubled my money. I was going to “cash out”, but I wanted the chance to “spin” and win more money. I kept playing and playing. Losing and losing.

I never did get the chance to spin. Instead, I watched in horror as I lost the money I gained AND the money I started out with.

I lost it all.

I sat there shell-shocked at the loss of “twenty WHOLE dollars!” (as I kept repeating to my friend). I kicked myself for letting the deadly sin of Greed get the best of me and not cashing out when I doubled my money in the beginning.

Then I began to think…this is how love is. Continue reading →

So What If He Likes Me?

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“You are beautiful.”

Three words that have been the death of me.

The beginning of a bad choice.

The opening line to a fatal ending.

The other day, I decided to establish two things with myself: I am beautiful. I am likable.

If I make these truths as real to me as my name, I won’t be a sucker for anyone who utters them anymore.

Continue reading →