Month: November 2010

The Fantabulous Five: My Love, My Dream, My Passion, My Plan & My Goal

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I decided a few weeks ago that I needed FOCUS.

Today, I changed my mind.

A few weeks ago (when I decided I needed to focus), I reasoned that I was trying to do too many things. I thought I was like the person who wanted to go North, South, East and West…at the exact same time. I want to progress professionally and career wise and I felt that if I didn’t concentrate my efforts, I wouldn’t progress at all.

Today, I decided that’s not true. Continue reading →

I Don’t Want Anything (Not Even Facebook & Twitter) Instead of God….

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I got to thinking tonight after church, I don’t want anything instead of God.

I don’t want anything in the place of or as a substitute for God. Not money. Not a career. Not a position. Not the truck in my garage. Not the clothes in my closet. Not an approving glance. Not my pride. Not my sleep. Not food. Not even my good name. Continue reading →

Enjoy Your Life

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Enjoy your life.

My dad used to always say that to me and like most other things he said (save your money, always bring a coat, put air in your tires, etc), it seemed to go in one ear and out the other until it was too late (and I was broke and freezing with a flat tire).

But today, it really did hit me.

I need to enjoy my life as it is right now. It’s not perfect. It’s not the one I signed up for. But it’s mine and I don’t have to spend every second trying to change it.

I feel like activity is ingrained in our minds. We always have to be striving for something. Working towards something. Writing something. Reading something. Buying something. Going somewhere. Just doing, doing, doing, and more doing, but when are we “done”? Never? It seems like the only time we stop to appreciate life is in death.

I want to change that in my own life. I want to appreciate my life AS-IS. Because as weird as it seems, I know that one day I will remember today as the “good-old days” and I want to remember this day as actually being GOOD.

I’m still applying for jobs and doing laundry and trying to get into the habit of cooking, but I’m also enjoying. God has blessed me tremendously and I will not return that blessing with complaining. I have nothing to complain about.

Right now I’m unemployed. And being unemployed sucks. I swear no one ever asked me where I work until now. I used to hemm and haw. But now I just say, “nowhere”.

For a while I felt like a failure. I don’t have a job? How embarrassing!

Then I began to think, I’m not embarrassed. I’m happy.

And one day I will be chasing breaking stories, reporting in the early morning hours, spending my weekends at a news desk, anchoring until the wee-hours of the night, and unable to silence my Blackberry for just 30 minutes of peace.

When that day comes, I want to be able to look back on today and say “I really enjoyed that time in my life.”

Thanks, but No Thanks

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Call me crazy, but I’ve already decided I’m not taking ANY more jobs unless it is the one that I want.

Of course making that decision is like deciding not to eat sweets for a week. This means that everyone from your boss at work to your elementary school boyfriend (who you haven’t seen since then) will buy you doughnuts, candy and cookies. Make that declaration on Saturday night and you can pretty much guarantee they’ll be giving out fresh baked cookies for FREE at church on Sunday morning.

So yeah, I know what I’m up against when I say that but I am so serious.

I am done with the jobs that I don’t want. The great tragedy of the “American Dream” is that it forces to people who desire it to spend their the majority of the day at a job they hate in order to finance a life they can’t afford nor find the time to enjoy.

I’m.Not.Doing.It.

Bidding “Bitter” Goodbye

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“I have decided to stick with love, hate is too great a burden to bear.” - MLK

A few weeks ago, I began to think…. Unforgiveness is a sin. Of course, that’s not a groundbreaking revelation in the least, but even in my understanding, I realized that I was missing something huge. Up until that moment, I had always been thinking about unforgiveness in the sense of the need to forgive a friend who didn’t give me any gas money, or a family member’s constant snide comments or the texting and driving teenager who cut me off in traffic….or the guy who shattered my window last week and stole my GPS, spare cell phones and car chargers. Those, I thought, are the people I need to forgive.

I knew that, big or small, forgiveness is essential to avoid bitterness from forming.

The Bible likens bitterness to a tree root and warns not to let roots of bitterness “spring up” (Heb 12:15). Just as a tree’s roots keep that tree in place no matter what, bitterness keeps a person in place no matter what and halts progress. The Bible also says in Eph 4:31-32: “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”

I’ve never been a fan of bitterness and I didn’t think I had any in my life….until I started to think about relationships. Could it be that I still harbored unforgiveness and maybe even bitterness in my heart for those men who may have hurt me in the past? Even the few that have sincerely apologized? I had to ask myself: I let him go but did I let it go? The hurt feelings? The ill-will? The seeds of anger? Was I bitter? I wondered: If the opportunity for revenge presented itself, would I take it? Would I even consider it?

If the answer was yes, then I still harbor unforgiveness. Continue reading →